As you may know, I am a workaholic. As you may also know, I am unemployed. In the short time that I have been unemployed, I have learned things that people like me can do to keep from going crazy. I will list them numerically.
1. Never sleep late. Always wake up at your normal time to keep a routine. I say this because I have a one year old and have no choice.
2. Cry in a cold shower for at least 5 minutes a day. This cleanses the mind, body, and soul and convinces you that you are crazy and should be working (even though you really aren't crazy).
3. Call up the Clorox company hot line and argue with them about how ALL of their products only kill 99.9% of household germs. Tell them that is not something to gloat about, you are very worried about that .1% of germs still living, and that you are going to invent a cleaner that gets 100% of the germs.
4. Find your oldest pair of jeans, cut them up into shorts, wear a sleeveless T-shirt and go to Wal-Mart and walk around asking random people if they need help finding something.
5. Go online, find the phone numbers to every U.S. Senator and call their offices and try to just carry on a normal conversation with their desk jockies. I am sure nobody asks them how their day is or how their life is going. I am sure you would get surprising answers.
6. Invent a blanket with sleeves, be happy that you are going to sell it and make millions of dollars, then relax, turn on the T.V., and see that they have already invented it and called it the Snuggy.
7. Call the Unemployment Office and apply for a job there to satisfy one of your two weekly required job searches.
8. Realize that your phone is just ringing to hear itself ring. Cell phones get lonely too and mine is wondering why I only talk on it only a couple of minutes a day now.
9. Vacuum the carpet.
10. Eat a large breakfast then watch The View. Each morning try to hold off vomiting longer each time.
And that is what will get you through unemployment. If you are still not happy, start a farm in your backyard and when people ask what you do, tell them you are a farmer.
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Monday, November 2, 2009
Learning To Listen
2009 has been a rough year for me. I am going to whine for a bit and throw myself a pity party. At the beginning of the year I got involved in politics. That was stressful. Then I had the hardest part of getting used to being a daddy. I have settled in quite nicely now. I have suffered from deep depression, I have looked for help. But I talked to my Papa about 2 weeks ago and he and I talked about God for a couple of hours. The one thing I got out of that talk was.... listen to the Lord more and stop talking for a second.
So I started to listen, intently. That is when I got TERMINATED from my job that I had work in for 6 1/2 years. Then my wife has had some health problems that have worried me. Now, today, I found out lil bit has the swine flu. I LISTENED AND ALL HE GAVE ME WAS THIS! That was my first thought. Then I got angry at him. Then I listened again.
I am the type of person that can be hit by life over and over again and I won't fight back. Only when I get that knock out shot that lands me on the mat do I fight. So I have recently found myself on the mat. After a couple of days of trying to regain my consciousness, because I was dazed by that shot I took in the face, I looked over to see the crowd cheering 'life' for the knock out win and 'life' raising his gloves in victory. That is when I turn over, I slowly get on all fours, and try to stand again. This take a bit because I hurt, my face and ribs and everything. But I am going to stand, and that is when life better watch out. You can kick this dog but when you corner me, I bite.
So my point is, did the Lord facilitate in the firing of me by my job? Don't know. But I will tell you that the fact that I was fired from a job that I had begun to loath, and was depressing me, and sucking the life out of me, I was too chicken to quit. Maybe he took out his boot and kicked me out of a situation I didn't need to be in. Will I find a good job? Will lil bit be OK? Will my wife stop getting stress-related symptoms? Not sure. But I am getting up from the mat and I am ready to fight now. But I am not alone, I am still listening to you Lord, and I know that where ever I go, it will probably be a lot better than where I have been. This is when I dig my heels in, stop retreating, and begin to fight. Thank you God for at least one thing, giving me Papa.
So I started to listen, intently. That is when I got TERMINATED from my job that I had work in for 6 1/2 years. Then my wife has had some health problems that have worried me. Now, today, I found out lil bit has the swine flu. I LISTENED AND ALL HE GAVE ME WAS THIS! That was my first thought. Then I got angry at him. Then I listened again.
I am the type of person that can be hit by life over and over again and I won't fight back. Only when I get that knock out shot that lands me on the mat do I fight. So I have recently found myself on the mat. After a couple of days of trying to regain my consciousness, because I was dazed by that shot I took in the face, I looked over to see the crowd cheering 'life' for the knock out win and 'life' raising his gloves in victory. That is when I turn over, I slowly get on all fours, and try to stand again. This take a bit because I hurt, my face and ribs and everything. But I am going to stand, and that is when life better watch out. You can kick this dog but when you corner me, I bite.
So my point is, did the Lord facilitate in the firing of me by my job? Don't know. But I will tell you that the fact that I was fired from a job that I had begun to loath, and was depressing me, and sucking the life out of me, I was too chicken to quit. Maybe he took out his boot and kicked me out of a situation I didn't need to be in. Will I find a good job? Will lil bit be OK? Will my wife stop getting stress-related symptoms? Not sure. But I am getting up from the mat and I am ready to fight now. But I am not alone, I am still listening to you Lord, and I know that where ever I go, it will probably be a lot better than where I have been. This is when I dig my heels in, stop retreating, and begin to fight. Thank you God for at least one thing, giving me Papa.
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